Probably Offensive

I got me a new pooch recently. By pooch I’m not talking about a porch over my belt buckle (beer belly) but really a dog. I don’t know what the hell she is, maybe a catahoula or some shit. She looks like a cross between a greyhound and a lab, with brindle coloring. She’s got a white sock and spot on her chest though. Her name is Pretty, and she kind of reminds me of a hyena from some angles. I got her a pink bandana with skulls on it yesterday, and she likes trying to eat the fucker off. I put peanut butter on my balls, and she licks it off. Nah just kidding, she doesn’t even need peanut butter, she loves my balls that much.

Oh yeah, moved into a duplex since the last post also. Fuck internet journals I say. I’m only writing this one because my silly friend lost her keys somewhere in my house and we are getting kind of bored. She already did my hair up all dorky style, and I’m all tired out so no physical activities are in order.